I was complementing a little boy on the job well done on his paper. I said "Nice job man." He said back to me "I'm not your man."
A few days after Valentine's day I had a funny conversation at school. A child brought me a late valentine and another child asked why he'd done that. I lightly said that the valentine was given to me because the child loved me. He smiled and says "yah, lots of kids love you. I love you too."
The same child as the motorcycle story constantly has funny things to say. When he was being screened for preschool to see if he qualified, he was a little frustrated that it was somewhat difficult. He said the following: "Me not know how you people do this."
I was in the blocks playing with a little boy who was building a motorcycle. He had copied the design from a few other little guys. When he was completed, I said "maybe you should try it out." He replied with "Me not think that's such a good idea."
I was doing a progress report with a little boy who has a Russian mother and a Hispanic Father. I asked him what the name of the shapes were. When I came to the circle, he said "It's round, like a truffle cake."
I was testing a child the other day to see if she qualified for our special ed preschool. One section of the test checks to see if they know their body parts... Where's your nose, your hair, then I asked her where her heel was. She thought for a second, looked down at her feet, then very simply stated, "I'm wearing crocks, my heels are at home."
The day after the Obama election, a child came to school with something important to say. She marched right up to me with her hands on her hips saying with quite the attitude, "Obama Won!" So, in my professional teacher voice, (wanting to know how much she heard at home), I said "What did he win?" She thought for a second, then replied matter-of-factly, "a trophy or something." If you don't think your kids are listening, think again. They may not hear it all, but they catch bits and pieces.
Today I had a funny conversation with a little girl. Keep in mind, her /k/ sound sounds like a /t/ sound. We were talking about the tent that we had set up in the classroom. She said, "I have a tent at home. It's a kitty tent." [Titty tent] Continuing the conversation with a slight smile on my face, I said "is it for kitties?" She answered back very seriously, "I don't have any kitties." [I don't have any titties.] I was laughing so hard by the time she got done talking about her titty tent. :)
When a 4-yr-old boy didn't get a job for the day, he asked "What am I...chop liver?"
When a 4-yr-old girl sat on Santa's lap, he asked her what she wanted for Christmas. She matter-of-factly replies, "Didn't you read my letter?"